This time last year...

October 12, 2005 was the exact date we conceived our first born... Our beautiful, sassy, amazing singing little girl! It's amazing how the doctor could figure my conception date... The exact day I was ovulating. It was pretty amazing and unexpected as Jason and I were intimate for some time. It was like God had this awesome plan for the both of us. For my parents to have and enjoy grandchildren early and for them to treat them as their own was special to me. It was definitely an amazing feeling with mixed emotions at the same time for all of us especially since we were first time parents going in this full force with no training or parenting skills. I was 19 and he was 23. We were so young. Hundreds of thousands of moms have come before me and will still come after me, but it did not make me as a new young mother or him as a new young father, any less special and I was ready for that.
As soon as we found out, I slowly announced it to all our friends and close family in fear of what they may think. I was mostly afraid to tell my parents, mainly my dad. Afterall I was only 19, still in college and this was unexpected. I didn't want him or anyone to think because of this baby, I would give up my whole life and future. I always was concerned about what my daddy would think because I was "daddy's girl". But after the baby news announcement and time went by as my belly grew larger and larger, he and my mom became very excited. My mom went with me to my first prenatal appointment and as soon as we saw the first pic (ultrasound) of M and heard her heartbeat, we took it straight to Jason and my dad because it was so beautiful. My daddy was in love too. You will be surprised at how different your life may be after you find out you have something little growing inside of you. It is an amazing out of body experience that no one other than mother's can feel. It's a love that you have for someone that you don't even know and can't even explain. The feeling you encounter after seeing your little peanut for the first time on the ultrasound and hearing that first rapid heartbeat that you know you made yourself with your own "magic" in your body. It's amazing how God made woman the unbelievable creatures we are.  

This time last year, I was vomiting, nauseous, emotional and hormonal. I was not expecting to have these feelings that the book told me about. I was uneducated about being a mother but I was determined to learn by watching videos, documentaries and watching mothers all around me. 

"What to Expect when you're Expecting" was my Bible. I read every milestone and prenatal moment we endure as pregnant women. There were exciting times and there were scary times but all in all, this book definitely prepared me along with the help from my own mother, for young motherhood. Motherhood to me, is hands-on. There is really no way in learning how to care for a little newborn until you actually experience it for yourself. Afterall, you get in tune to motherhood as it comes naturally easier. Three years later we conceived Elijah and I would still do it all over again. 
Here is my placenta. Yea, it's pretty nasty. Thanks, to my mother, she decided to take a picture for me, to show me how much I have accomplished and what I endured myself naturally without an epidural or medications. Isn't it amazing what us mothers can endure during pregnancy? God definitely knew what he was doing! And when Jason cut the umbilical cord for our daughter and they threw her on my all bloody, splotchy and covered in my fluids, I was the happiest girl around.
My life on July 17, 2006 changed and I was so happy to call her my own, daughter. We have grown so close and share this bond that is amazing. We have been through so much together and still have our whole lives to learn, grow and laugh. She is my baby and I am her mother.